I'm Fine! I didn't cry! I'm smiling. LOL!
People that knows which course I'm going seems to be more sad than me. LOL!!
I'm abit shocked la. Seriously.
8.52 and everybody messages you with a bright smile!
And I realise why I no message. Rofl.
So I turned on my lappy.
Got to the web and saw Republic Poly, R13 Business informations.
wth.HAHA!
I like so stunt! The worst course on my mind in the worst school.
Well. This time I never complain about God.
I never quarrel with him.
I'm laughing with him.
After being fed with so much grace, I understand that he was never against me.
Well. Before today, I received a message from M.O.E saying that I'm qualified for the interview for studying at Nafa.
I'm completely stunt about that.
Cos I thought I couldnt make it with such art grades.
I believe in doing my best and not pushing myself any further.
I leave the rest to God.
I'm not going to go to republic poly, FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE. (:
So I woke up at 7 today.
I told Daddy God that if I don't enter poly I can go Nafa Nafa Nafa! xD
So in the end! Hahahas. My mouth so xia suay.
But I know its not God.
I shall now start preparing. Going back to school later and skiping work.
I need prepare port folio and interview questions.
Start getting back to those days when I'm so addicted to art. I still am.
I'm abit disappointed and I told Rochelle I felt like Joseph.
Joseph is a guy in the bible.
He was bless and loved by God.
But his brothers never liked him.
So they stripped away his expensive clothe, tied him up and sold him away as a servant.
He was then bought by this guy call potipher [ duno how to spell ]
But you know, God was with Jospeh and everything he did was blessed.
What ever he touched was bless.
Cut the story, He became a big shot!
While I got my art results, I blamed got for almost anything.
It was so called the lowest point of my life.
And now I'm in hot soup. Rofl.
But I know God.
This, is unmerited favour. The question that I've been asking.
How to get unmerited favour.
It is when it is not of your deeds.
You can get a C5! But thats not the case! Come on!
Now people can start pointing fingers at me and say I talking shit.
But God and I! I'm gonna do my best.
Interview faster come! :D
Jiayou Weiting. I know God has a way for me.
Buhbye! sleeping time :3

676 th post for my blog.
Today finally can rest at home!
Working for so many days and finally!
While sister cuts off my internet connection, I shall start typing.
This few days something else occured to me and I feel like telling them about him.
Then there was this sudden imagined tight slap from the air that woke me up :3
Well, you are beautiful in my memory. The old you.
But if often brings up another issue. Which is, you've changed, gone.
So now, every thought about you are like salt on a healed wound.
For a certain fact I know that I'm not like anyone else, I'm easily shaken. Thats why I must now stand firm on my decision.
Currently in the state of perfect peace. Air con, piano music, lappy and comfy blanky :3
I'm aging. AHH. lol!
Oh. My blog is also at perfect peace. [dead]; despite the updates. lol.
zi- high nia.
2 more days :D 27 January 2010, 8.00a.m. RESULTS!
I hope I can get into visual com. I realise I ain't really into law. Drama and psych wun take me for sure. Left with 3rd choice :B
Ohhhh~
I don't know why. After so long, I thought you would step back.
But it appears that you have only took a tiny step.
I've already given up. Its your turn :]
Times like this, I only pray that I'm not alone.
As much as I'm concerned, really. I thank you for everything you've done discretly and was not as discret as you thought it was.
lol.
Anw, back to blogging.
Tmr going to buy ear piece and eat dinner with cousin. Dam! My ear piece spoil D:
T.T Why my birthday not tmr! LOL!
hahahas.. Still got abit of savings but alot of things to buy. Pray that I get more income :3
Friday faster come! :P
Daddy birthday coming. Valerie's also. Cos same date :D
haahahas. Stupid sister got stupid suggestion which simply digs a big hole in my pocket.
Gahh. Nvm! I love papa. :D
Hais. Still many things on my mind now.
I really don't understand. Alot of things.
Even myself is a puzzle to me.
Work is fun. People there are quite nice. I'm still as usual. Complaining about almost everything and anything.
I'm still alive and kicking. Lalala.
I'm doing well. Seems to be pretty jubilant and noisy.
Yet sometimes watching couples get married makes me sad...
And then you see old people at the tables.
And then you recall about your dead grandparents that will never see you get married.
Ahma, don't worry! I take picture then burn to you :3 [ If I get to get married la :3 ]
hahahas. So now, My sis still havent give me back my internet connection.
Gaaahh! Downloading of auditionsea here also got problem. Stupid window 7 :[
Wednesday work then say Buhbye to Jos for 10 days, then work on saturday, then celebrate papa and jiejie bday.Then I'm free for another week. Wasei. My life so bored.
But anyway hope got school to go so that I can start school soon. :3
hahahas! No Nafa very sad one you know!
Nafa T.T When I old liao nothing to do I'll go!!! WAIT FOR ME!
I'll not give up painting. Grades cannot kill my hobby!
You! Cannot stop me from drawing.
Hais. Although I'm very discouraged.
But I'll try to dis-discourage myself. lol! x:
Oh ya. Last words, although my internet not back yet.
LIYI! QIANWEN! I MISS YOU! :D
Hahahas. Okay. And and.
To express my deep thoughts.
I don't need someone that can cook, or someone that is smart. Neither do you have to be rich or handsome. You don't have to drink or smoke. It just makes everything worst.
There was a story.
Long ago, God made Adam and Eve, and created a feeling called love.
He turned that feeling into an apple, divided it and threw it back to the earth.
I want my half apple :3 And the feeling just comes by itself :)
I like to watch tao hua xiao mei :3 Because it wrote a story that I had always believed.
So I don't care what you like. You pissed me off and I quit my job. :] zzzz.
________________________________________________________
Maybe he just feel like my half apple. Somewhat similar. But not. ):
Nights...

When times are dark, pray to the lord and he will open your eyes to light.
This few days work until super super tired.
Yesterday very late then eat.
Then I do 2 table. I pour shark fin until the bowl drop into the whole thing.
So stunt. Rofl.
Later going to work. FINALLY.
Tmr onwards can rest awhile.
Hands cram. hahaha.
Time for lunch :3
hahahas. Later day meeting jos? hahas. she going to work soon :B
Okay! Update more soon :D buhbyeee!

Oh. Today went out with Liyi and Jos xD
had fun at far east.
walk around, ate around :3
27 of jan is coming!
Results come out and its time to start school soon.
Me and Jos currently obsessed with SHINee.
Omg. The Jong Hyun very SHUAI :P
okay weiting. Focuse.
Oh. so! HE VERY SHUAI!
Cough*
I've been thinking about many things.
Things that come naturally even when you're not in love.
I don't know what I'm thinking sometimes.
But I have also realise that this isn't what I'm pursuing.
I'm gonna be more alert. I'm getting confused and brain jam.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TevWL1ZN9Vk
I like this song. :]
I like the show too.
I like the feeling the show gives.
I like recalling. It makes everything so special.
Makes memories come alive.
Those dedicate memories.
That will never exist again in my life, with the same person. :]
I see your face, I would never ever run from you. You were the one, though.

Happy Birthday to liyi :D
5th year celebrating together.
Time flies and we've known each other for so long x)
Hope that you will stay happy ok! Don't worry about anything.
Must look after yourself more than us. :D
Love you!!! <3
___________________________________
Today is Sunday. Later Jos say I skip church again. hahahas.
I'm going to church in 5 minutes time. so blog first.
Hope that results will come out soon.
I don't think Moe want to interview me since my art get C5.
So poly, here I come!!
Please~ I want go to the choices I've picked.
Like dreaming like that. Get 17 picked law and management.
LOL. get 17! go pick Drama and psychology!
Get 17! go pick visual com!
WALAOS ....
hahahas. Although had a tiff with Daddy God, I still hope to go to somewhere I WANT. Not what is good for me.
So fuck up cannot go Nafa lol. >.>
Gahh! later already! :D
Ring Ding Ding!!! buhbyeee:D

I went blogging around.
Its an awesome day with friends at east coast park to celebrate liyi's birthday!
We baked a cake yesterday. Me and Jos. LOL.
hahas. After that today surprised her at her door.
She said the cake was nice :D <<< * smile with pride*
the whip cream ar. I still find it very strange. lol x)
Then we went east coast.
In the train Jos so xia suae..
She sat beside this aunty sleeping and keep falling on her.
Later when I let my seat, the other uncle was falling asleep and falling on her too.
LOL. Its like dam funny! x)
And I must say, Me and Jos siao already, keep listen to SHINee Ring Ding Dong in the train.
After that we cab to east coast at eunos.
Later reach le I tried roller bladding.
OMG~ Forget le almost fall down.
Then later I held on to jos Then I almost fall! My butt havent land yet though. lols.
Thanks to her. ahahas. Then Funniest Part!
Liyi carried me and put me back to the seat!
As though I'm a box. hahahas.
After that me and liyi cycled the couple bike.
First time of my life, I traveled on a bicycle!!
Hahahas! at first scary, later was fun :3
Cut the story xD
We bath, then liyi cubicle got lizard then I talked to the lizard. LOL.
We went out and suddenly. SUDDENLY, decided to eat steamboat. LOL!!
Then we ate alot. I ate alot. Ever since i fail my art I've been eating alot.
Me and dion took ALOT, I MEAN ALOT. of hot dogs. LOL.
hahahas. then the ice cream there is DELICIOUS~
price less than 20 :D but if you don't like china people, please do not go. ROFL. x:
hahahas. After steamboat we went to bugis. Dion left.
Then we went shopping for Jos dress.
I bought a pair of shoes. FINALLY I BOUGHT A PAIR OF SHOES! DAM IT!
Jos bought her dress too x)
Then later got the lift incident.
lol x) I very tired post arh. Legs also very suan. Affect until hands also suan x:
Then later take train home after eating the lolipop the liyi bought for us :3
Came home and now I'm here, SUPER TIRED.
Today I shuffled my songs and heard " What do I have to do."
I remembered the day when I was listening to it in class, at 4e4.
And then I went out and stare around. I was alone.
I was thinking about you.
And I felt very sad.
While i was in train today, that kind of feeling overwhelmed me again.
But it felt like a feeling, a very empty feeling.
Pieces of puzzle put together, but formed a picture that puzzles.
I'm very happy that I'm standing up :D
I'm glad that that feeling is gone.;]
time to sleep now.
Dreams, dreams. When we've started things. Dreams of me and you. :)
End with lyrics from Lily Allen. Not the song Littlest Thing this time.
This song is FOR YOU. (:
Smile by Lily Allen.

Oh. Long post ba.
O levels is like. ...
I passed all my subjects.
In case people start asking and make me so fuck up, I shall post them here.
El- B4
Chi- B3
Sci- C5
Math- C5
Hum- B3
Art- C5
_________________________
L1R4 17 after minus CCA points. Strangely. ... Don't know how they count.
And indeed I did dream about that number though I thought It was like a complete nightmare.
The first thing I did was cry. My art got C5.
Jesus. Omg.
I rather fail everything and get at least a B3.
I cannot go NAFA already...
Oh. Thats why I'm so sad.
Also, Its almost ridiculous how you actually give your all and in the end get a C5.
So I think even if I improve, I can only get B4.
Fishballs. -.-
So forget about art. I really don't dare to draw or paint again.
I have put everything aside and picked my poly choices.
Though I anyhow picked, I still submit it. ._.
I really don't give a dam where I go.
Stupid jin mao say I too kan jiong.
For God sake, Its not you that fail art .
I'm so discourage and disappointed.
Never the less I still have to move on :]
Lets just admit it. Weiting, you can't draw.
And your ideas are just freaking stupid that nobody appreciates it.
I now currently addicted to comedy. For the fact that I have sleepless nights and alot of tears to cry. :3
Buhbye to art teacher career. * Fly *
So, DON'T ASK ME ABOUT MY RESULTS.
There is nothing I can celebrate for.
So, Goodbye. I will come back if anything worsens.

I'm fine. Results are fine. Art grades sucks so much just makes me wanna cry.
Choose poly le. wunt go art school anyway.
hope can go the course i wan. if not dun study poly then go ite. :/
I'm at the most depress, angry and troubled stage.
Stop asking me about my results. irritating.
gah. bye.

Hehe. Currently watching Tv in living room while blogging :3
Today went out with Jazzy and Rochelle to watch Shelock Holmes.
OMG! sooo nice x)
He is soooo smart and observant.
& the movie was some sort of humourous. lol.
After that walked around then we went to Harris.
After that I met joscelin. Then we went back to school because she wanted to pay the fees.
But too late le so tmr we go back again.
Then I wanted to go art room [ as usual -.- ]
but we saw Ms ho fue ming on the way so we talked for AWHILE.
Then later go there le art room close le. Tmr then go.
I want ask about the syf :3
hahas. and then~ went to take money!
Finally can take le.
Hehe. Hope that thursday and friday and saturday and sunday! can come soon :D
Thursday eating with liyi and jos and other friends too! x)
Friday getting pay ba? :D
Saturday going MOE for training session.
Then Sunday go church.
hohoho. okay! Time to end off :D
Buhbyee x) hahas!

Today finally can use lappy in room le.
Oh. Saturday and Sunday was fun and tiring.
Today went Jp.
gahh. money still cannot receive. must wait.
hope tomorrow can make it to the movies.
Just finish watching Hai Pai Tian Xin and Tao Hua Xiao Mei.
So this time change again. next episode for both, thxm nicer :3
hahas. So school must have start for those juniors le.
I wish I can go back to school...
Oh mann.
Yesterday I've decided to stop being stupid :]
I don't want to think about all the " what if "
I won't forget you, I'll remember you.
Time to love, T-ara. Rocks.
(: talks about this couple breaking up.
One finding, One avoiding. & in the end they missed everything, even though they still love each other alot.
The mv was really nice :B
Oh. So, you know chin,
I'd really loved you. don't hate me.
don't feel uncomfortable. it was past tense.
every little thing, I managed to draw them down.
But I've thrown them away, I've forgotten.
I don't want to stay in that shell.
I need to be myself and for once I want to confess.
You can never stop another person's mouth.
But this, they never understand.
what I'm really doing, this; nobody knows, even you.
Maybe he saw, but he chose to keep quiet.
You don't know how much courage I took to speak.
Every sentence I say to you, I need a day to practice.
I find it awfully dumb but love is stupid :3
I'm gonna turn 17 soon. I'm gonna grow and be an adult.
Adults don't get to love like this. They go for numbers.
I'm gonna get into other schools whereby there won't be anymore minds like those we used to have.
Yet we can never stop time. Let us just adapt.
I want a good sleep tonight.. I'm gonna stop here. Everything.
Every single detail about you. Here, full stop, the end.
I'll wake up, grow up, move on.
Good night. :] Tmr will be better! ; wout you.

Ohhh. Posting with new lappy :3
In the end never buy mac book pro. Ben say better use familiar de cos mac book pro alot of things different. gahhh.
Oh. End up buy Lenovo de lappy. but the cost still ok. 1649 only. better than the mac book pro.
and then finally get pay le~ woo.
waiting for second pay :D
Today is saturday. 2nd day of the year.
Oh man! the service was awesome! xD
SO LONG! omg! hahas. but then very happening.
even though is arrow service.
okay~ then then after that eat with rochelle and jazzy.
hahas. meeting for movie on tuesday :D
Tmr got church too :3
Oh yah. Most of the sec 4 are very anxious now because O level results are coming out!
Not sure of the date but is this month.
Anyway don't worry okay? Though will still worry.
I found this peace inside me that calms myself down whenever I think about O level de results.
Actually I feel that even if you scared also no use.
And Daddy has done the rest! Today de service is REST AND REIGN!
Amen! hahas. Jesus will do the rest! I have done my best :D
and anoint the whole thing with oil x_x omg. HAHA.
LOL! now adays de mood not so bad le.
And And I in love with the Time to love by T-ara!
Omg~ But I like Big Bang more :3
Anyway. As I was saying. This few nights cannot sleep well and no appetide.
But today pastor benjiamin say" Those who lose sleep at night, God wants you to know He has bless you guys with sleep and that sleeping is a blessing! Rest in his love~"
Gahh. Tonight will be a testimony!
Hope monday can go shopping :D
And And! AS I WAS SAYING. LOL.
This few days de mood really brighten alot.
Thank you Daddy God for your constant reminder of your presence.
That I may be forgotten, but your love will never forsake me.
Amen!
And and that I may feel very sad over some issues, yet I give them all to you.
I really am feeling that I'm not so affected by him anymore (:
No matter how bad the conversation.
Feels abit. But gone with the wind~ *blows*
hahas. cya around soon. gonna wake up early so its time to rest :B
Good night!